Monthly Archives: January 2019

Achievement Unlocked

As 2018 became 2019, I decided to try working a new habit into my morning routine. After feeding my cat and making myself a cup of coffee, I would sit at my laptop and write a paragraph of fiction. Every morning. Not a paragraph of the same story, not a paragraph that would necessarily grow to be larger than a paragraph, definitely not a paragraph I would show anyone. Just write at least one paragraph, at least three sentences long, of something fictional. It could be the beginning of a story. It could be the ending on an unwritten story. It could fall somewhere in the middle. It could just be a description of a person, a thing, a place. It could be some fictional history or other worldbuilding. It could just be practicing sentence structure and otherwise be nonsense. I just wanted to get into the habit of practicing writing the way an artist sketches or a musician practices their instrument.

As of today, I’ve written a full month of paragraphs. What do I do now?

I mean, besides keep writing, obviously.


Loveable

i know i’m loveable
but please tell me anyway
because between
sunset & sunrise
my mind goes racing
stumbling
storming
crumbling

i know i’m deserving
but please go ahead
remind me again & again
when i’m feeling
shaken
insecure
false-started
broken-hearted
crushed & marooned
imagining a starless sky

which is
honestly
quite often

i know
i know
i know not to listen to
the voice in the night
& yet
between the sun & the moon
between the candle & the star
reflected in my eyes
is a hint
that i need you to remind me
i’m loveable


Carousel Song

listen to this tumble dryer
deep within my ribcage
listen to this whistling wind
rhapsodically cherry-flavored & cut
from the same cloth as you
under the same sky as you
listen to this tumble dryer
listen to this whistling wind

delirium west-ended
coughed up on the doorstep at midnight
phrased as carefully as you
whispered to the whistling wind
in the backroom of my heart
under the shadow of your heart
deep within your ribcage
deep within delirium

beneath the silk parasol
underneath the grave
beneath the morose oak tree
listen to the carousel
it’s not saying anything
as the rain storms in my ribcage
never coming up again
never coming up again
never coming up again
listen to this whistling wind


The Horizon Seems So Much Further Away

sooner was remembered
in crystal palaces forgotten
i keep forgetting to be authentic
because lies are easier
under the light of a waxing moon


Unshakeable

why can’t i shake myself away from the starlit witch?
what could i do to break this spell?
kiss delirium full on the lips & gaze
into the jeweled eyes of the moon
before insecurity eats my tongue
my brain turned into apple jam

what could she do to break the spell?
tear my paper bones to confetti
blare a conch shell into my ear
with razors of hate under her fingernails

but insecurity comes in like a wraith
& howls out all sense & stone

a silver owl for a shield is no good
against a broom wielded
by a marked obsession
but what could i do to break this spell?
what could i do to shake myself away?